Princeton often aims to be like Silicon Valley, but perhaps there is one aspect of Silicon Valleyour area should not emulate. According to this graphic contributed by Jen Rhee, Silicon Valleyhas some racist tendencies.Whether these statistics are accurate or not, we cannot confirm, but they are worthy of discussion.
Created by: OnlineITDegree.net
What specific issues of concern related to race need to be addressed in your community?On Monday, June 4, at 7:30 p.m., on the second floor of the Princeton Public Library (ask at the desk for the room number) Not in Our Town will sponsor the last in this season's series of "Continuing Conversations on Race." This session is a follow-on from May's discussion, "What was your earliest encounter with a race issue?" Newcomers are most welcome. These sessions are a safe, secure place to discuss difficult issues.
“Not In Our Town” Should Take a Stand Against Other Forms of Discrimination
From a letter to a Not in Our Town Princeton board member:
Reply Close JW, PHS Students Receive Unity Awards
United States society is historically and presently structured by race.White people have a privileged position within that structure. Many white people understand this implicitly and are uncomfortable with the inherent unfairness, but do not know what to do about it. This workshop is intended to give white people some basic knowledge about: * racial structure* building connections and cross-racial alliances* finding direction on your journey as an effective change agent* building a personal support network for the work you doThe workshop touches on several topics in an introductory way, including~ the origin of white identity~ colorblindness~ feelings about cross-racial relationships~ feelings about white identity~ anti-racism and local change efforts~ how to be an ally~ the impact of racism on white people~ how to develop a support network~ resources for further study and personal developmentFormat: A 6-hour workshop offered on a single day with a morning session, a lunch break, and an afternoon session. The workshop uses didactic presentation, small group discussion, large group discussion, and a slide show presentation. Handouts are made available to participants.The registration fee covers all materials, plus lunch. Participants willalso receive a free copy of the book Accountability and White Anti-racistOrganizing: Stories from Our Work (which lists for $17.95).The workshop has been developed under the care of the Center for the Study of White American Culture, Inc. (www.euroamerican.org) in Roselle, NJ, principally through the efforts of Robin Alpern and Jeff Hitchcock, who also serve as facilitators. Robin and Jeff are experienced white anti-racistactivists with a history as organizers and trainers working in cross-racialalliances.For more information, contact:Robin Alpern (914) 736-5447, robin.alpern@gmail.comJeff Hitchcock (908) 245-4972, contact@euroamerican.org
The way that "Continuing Conversations on Race" works is -- nothing said in the room, gets repeated outside the room. These monthly sessions are valuable, specifically for their confidentiality. However --after the last session, Roberto Schiraldi offered some additional insights on the comments that he had made, and we welcome his thoughts for this blog. The problem -- We don't always know how to respond to racist or biased remarks and jokes. Laugh? Get upset? Ignore? Roberto had gone to a multicultural workshop led by Dr. Tina Paone of Monmouth University. Paone leads various diversity training workshops including "Take Off the Rose-Colored Glasses, Understanding Whiteness" (a full-day workshop) and "Race Card: How Does Systemic Racism Affect People of Color" (half-day). Some of Paone's observations come from materials developed by International Training and Development LLC, 2007. 
Click here for a preview of Ouch That Stereotype Hurts, am excellent video from that organization, which includes the following points. -The first response can be as simple as "ouch"
Congratulations to the six Princeton students who received Not in Our Town Unity Awards on May 6. Presented at a reception at Princeton University’s Carl A. Fields Center, the awards honor students who are role models in their efforts to promote respect for diversity and to advance the cause of race relations. Each student received a certificate; they will also receive a gift at honors assemblies in their schools, scheduled for June 5 at Princeton High School and June 11 at John Witherspoon Middle School. Honorees include two eighth graders at John Witherspoon Middle School (Isaiah Sigler and Sumaiyya Stephens) and four seniors at Princeton High School (Halima-Rakiya Gikandi, Jemima Nelson, Handy Pierre, and Milosh Popovic.)Not in Our Town aims to speak truth about 'everyday racism' and other forms of prejudice and discrimination, says Wilma Solomon, NIOT president. In cooperation with the Princeton Public Library, NIOT presents a monthly discussion series, “Continuing Conversations on Race.” The organization, which consists of representatives from a dozen faith communities, also sponsors book readings, workshops, film series, panels, and anti-racism demonstrations. "Our hope is that Princeton will continue to grow as a town in which the ideals of friendship, community and pride in diversity prevail," says Solomon.
The fact that you may honestly believe you are not biased does not free you from unconscious racism. This comes from an article by Toure in Time magazine. "The racist mind need not hate every black person it encounters, and indeed not hating all may serve as a valuable safety valve, releasing pressure and proving to the mind itself that it is not racist. Few people want to think of themselves as bad or evil," writes Toure. Toure's book "Whose Afraid of Post-Blackness? What It Means to be Black Now" was named a New York Times notable book in 2011.
At the Stand Against Racism event, at the YWCA Princeton last Friday, those who discussed the documentary "The Princeton Plan" agreed that everyone needs to continue the conversations about how Princeton's desegregation plan worked. It was 1948 when Princeton desegregated its classrooms by merging two schools -- the school in the traditionally black neighborhood and the one on Nassau Street. Children in kindergarten and elementary school went to Nassau Street, and those in junior high went to Quarry Street. Some were jubilant about the plan's success. Others resented the way it was done.Continue the conversation at Not in Our Town's regular "first Monday" session at the Princeton Public Library on Monday, May 7, at 7:30 p.m. With this series, Continuing Conversations on Race, Not in Our Town offers a safe and confidential place to talk about difficult subjects. The topic planned for this month is very appropriate: tell about your first experience with racial differences. To Shirley Satterfield, this experience came in fourth grade when she left the Quarry Street school to go to the formerly all-white school. The students got along fine, said Satterfield. It was when the teacher replied to -- when someone said "Shirley's blushing" -- "Negroes don't blush."When was your first experience with racial differences and how did that affect your life?
Libby Schwartz shares her reaction to the Stand Against Racism event at the YWCA Princeton -- the screening of the documentary The Princeton Plan, about school desegregation in 1948, followed by discussion from Shirley Satterfield and Henry Pannell.
But living with opportunity for a life of developed potential and happiness is indeed what the founding fathers promised every American. It is not a fantasy that the contemporary powers-that-be in this country can cavalierly dismiss. If Princeton, a small town, could begin, many years ago, an enlightened program to fight segregated schools in its borders, then it certainly has the wealth and intellectual heft today to counter the current direction of the country and stop it before it grows much worse. The key is to engage some of those who have the wealth and position--and still possess the compassion--to join with others to turn the country around. It starts with a small movement but can grow with understanding and a commitment to the constitution's original intentions for all Americans.
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Gather at Palmer Square on Friday, April 27, at 8:15 a.m. and then walk together to the Princeton YWCA for a showing of an important film, "The Princeton Plan: 50 Years Later" featuring guest speakers Shirley Satterfield and Henry Pannell.This Palmer Square "Stand" is sponsored by the Princeton Human Services Commission and Cranbury Station GalleriesThe YWCA Princeton hosts the film screening and discussion from 9 to 10 a.m. at Bramwell House, 59 Paul Robeson Place, Princeton. Light refreshments will be served.Last year Not in Our Town encouraged merchants to post signs in the windows to support this movement, and many are still on display. For more information on the Stand Against Racism movement -- which began here in Princeton, see the Stand Against Racism website
Letter to the editor, as published in the Times of Trenton and other newspapers
The writers are members of Not In Our Town.
The feeling of aloneness is one of the most painful consequences of bullying, writes A.O. Scott in the New York Times, regarding "Bully," the Lee Hirsch documentary movie. Scott blames adults for failing to protect children from bullying. In a review entitled "Behind Every Harassed Child? A Whole Lot of Clueless Adults" Scott says that the feeling of aloneness is also, in some ways, a cause of bullying. He writes: It is almost always socially isolated children (the new kid, the fat kid, the gay kid, the strange kid) who are singled out for mistreatment. For some reason — for any number of reasons that hover unspoken around the edges of Mr. Hirsch’s inquiry — adults often fail to protect their vulnerable charges.
Comments on the documentary website reveal bullying takes place in the workplace as well as in the schools. For instance: I am a college professor. I have been the victim of workplace bullying for 8+. Police were called about the harassment three times; I have suffered two nervous breakdowns, and I'm currently on medical leave. My career and my health have been destroyed. My administration has acknowledged the harassment; but they have done nothing to effectively address the situation; because....andI have experienced bullying for the first time in my life. I have been detained for two hours at a time over weekends, during which my boss stares at me and repeats the same rhetorical questions over and over again, sighing and shaking her head in despair when I can no longer think of a suitable answer to the same question. This questioning is so that she can "understand" the problem (which has been resolved long ago) and take "remedial" action. She never gets violent or raises her voice, although she has impugned my integrity. She uses words from her pedagogy manuals to "correct" me; she demanded my computer password so that she can read my emails. For the first time in my life I dread going to work....
The national organization of Not in Our Town is contributing to the discussion by sponsoring teaching guides to the movie through a related organization, Not in Our School. For help on workplace bullying, go to New York Healthy Workplace Advocates.
For ways to help students resist bullying, visit the Kidsbridge Tolerance Museum in Ewing, New Jersey.The trailer for the documentary shows the bullies persecuting the child -- and then shows the principal telling the mother "I've BEEN on that bus -- they are as good as gold!"
Your Child, Bully or Victim: Understanding and Ending Schoolyard Tyranny, by Peter Sheras, was one of the resources recommended at a Not in Our Town Princeton program on April 10 on Bullying: Changing the Culture - the Bystander's Dilemma.Parents tend to ignore the presence of bullying behavior in the community and the schools, says Sheras. Bullying is not a question of "bad kids versus good kids," he says, adding that nearly every child has the capacity to be both bully and victim. Both need help. Adults need to change the culture.Other references (those available at the Princeton Public Library are starred) include:• The Bully, the Bullied, and the Bystander, by Barbara Coloroso *• Queen Bees and Wannabes, by Rosalind Wiseman *• Odd Girl Out: The Hidden Culture of Aggression in Girls, by Rachel Simmons *• Your Child: Bully or Victim? Understanding and Ending School Yard Tyranny, by Peter Sheras• A Parents Guide to Understanding and Responding to Bullying: The Bully Busters Approach, by A Horne, J. Stoddard, C. Bell• Bullies are a Pain in the Brain, by Trevor Romain*• Say Something, by Peggy Moss (for elementary school-age children)*• Books by Trudy Ludwig (for elementary school-age children)*
The Bystander's Dilemma: Call and ResponseMembers of Not in Our Town Princeton and Corner House's GAIA Project gave this dramatic presentation on April 10, 2012 to an audience of 150 youth and adults at the Princeton Public Library. Entitled "Bullying - Changing the Culture: The Bystander's Dilemma," the program included skits put together by youth from the GAIA Project and NIOT. Todd Reichart directed this call and response segment, which featured individuals speaking with gestures and choral responses. In rehearsal, participants improvised movements until they found ones that felt "right." Where did we get the individual statements? We collected them from personal experience -- and from a previous program that Not in Our Town did at the library. (Photos of the easel sheets, with names for "bully," "target," and "bystander" contributed by the audience, are courtesy of Greta Cuyler of Princeton Patch who wrote about the presentation.) Anyone is welcome to use or adapt this presentation as below: The single voice person will rise and say their part starting with their gesture, and staystanding, looking at the audience as the response is given. As they are going down to sit, thenext single voice person rises. Everyone is part of the response. (This could also be performed in two lines, with those in the back line stepping forward to speak.)There are two parts, but to be performed without pause between:I. And Nobody Did Anything (in chorus)II. I Didn’t Know What to Do. (in chorus)The parts between are single voices (IN CAPS), and in chorus (italics).The single voice parts have simple gestures for the first part, as indicated here -- or make up your own. Repeat the gesture several times.The second part could also have gestures.I. And Nobody Did Anything 
1. IN MIDDLE SCHOOL, ONE KID USED TO PUSH ME INTO THE LOCKERSWHENEVER HE WALKED BY.(a push gesture)And nobody did anything.2. I’M A WAITRESS. SOME PEOPLE COME IN HERE OFTEN AND THEY TREATME LIKE DIRT. I FEEL HELPLESS.(hands on waist/hip)And nobody did anything.3. THOSE GIRLS WERE BULLYING ME FOR WEEKS. THEN THEY JUMPED ME INA PUBLIC PLACE. AT LEAST 3 PEOPLE WALKED BY.(hit own thighs in distress)And nobody did anything.4. I’M FROM AFRICA. SOME KIDS KEPT CALLING ME A “MONKEY”. I ASKED ATEACHER FOR HELP. SHE SAID “GET OVER IT”.(point to self; point toward audience as teacher)And nobody did anything.5. WHERE I WORK, MY CONTRIBUTIONS ARE REPEATEDLY IGNORED – LIKEI’M NOT EVEN THERE.(hand across forehead)And nobody did anything.6. I USED TO WEAR PINK SNEAKERS TO SCHOOL AND THE KIDS CALLEDME A FAGGOT AND GAY. THEN THEY LAUGHED AND SAID “JUST KIDDING”.(kicking foot out as if looking at shoes)And nobody did anything.7. MY FRIENDS AND I HAVE BEEN IN THAT SHOP SEVERAL TIMES. THESALES PERSON SEEMS TO FOLLOW US AROUND BUT NOT THE WHITECUSTOMERS.(walk as if walking in, then walk with arms folded across chest as the salesperson)And nobody did anything.8. MY GROUP OF FRIENDS IN MIDDLE SCHOOL OFTEN EXCLUDED MEFROM THINGS THEY WERE DOING. ONE DAY THEY JUST STARTED YELLINGAT ME, IN FRONT OF EVERYBODY OUTSIDE SCHOOL, CALLING ME “FAT”AND I LOOKED LIKE SHREK.And nobody did anything.II “I DIDN’T KNOW WHAT TO DO” 
9. I FELT SORRY FOR THE VICTIM, BUT SOME OF THE BULLIES WERE MYFRIENDS.I didn’t know what to do.10. I WAS AFRAID I’D MAKE IT WORSE.I didn’t know what to do.11. I WASN’T SURE WHAT WAS HAPPENING. I THOUGHT THEY WERE “GOODBOYS”. SOME WERE LAUGHING. I DECIDED “BOYS WILL BE BOYS”.I didn’t know what to do.12. IT LOOKED PRETTY VIOLENT. I DIDN’T WANT TO GET HURT.I didn’t know what to do.13. THE PERSON I WAS WITH DIDN’T WANT TO GET INVOLVED; I WAS TORN.I didn’t know what to do.14. I WAS AFRAID THEY’D CALL ME SOMETHING INSULTING.I didn’t know what to do.
Bullying has happened for decades, but according to Michelle Alexander, co-author of Little Girls Can be Mean: Four Steps to Bully Proof Girls in the Early Grades, it is happening on a larger scale -- it is more permanent and more public, making it more necessary for parents to step in. But don't jump in right away! In this YouTube excerpt, she recommends four steps for parents:1. Observe the social scene changes in behavior.2. Connect with your child in a new way. Empathize, even when think your daughter is the mean one.3. Guide your child with simple, compassionate strategies.Come up with a list of possible ideas, she should come back to you with the results, the two of you are working together.4. Support your daughter to act more independently to face the social issues.Alexander's book is one of those recommended by Not in Our Town Princeton, as part of an April 10, 2012 program on "Bullying: Changing the Culture." Elementary school kids are ready for guidance from parents or teachers, says Alexander. It is the perfect age to deal with bullying.
Reactions to Bystander's Dilemma: II
To continue the conversation about Bystanders (those who don't act when they see bullying) and Upstanders (those who do act), here are some questions for thought: What inspires you to act as an upstander? When have you stood up for someone who was the target of bullying, mistreatment or injustice? or I am willing to be an upstander by_____________________. (finish the sentence). Anwers? Thoughts?
7-9 PM APRIL 10th 
These books about "The Bystander's Dilemma" are listed on the Princeton Regional Schools anti-bullying website and are available at the Princeton Public Library,Queen Bees and Wannabes Helping your Daughter Survive Cliques, Gossip, Boyfriends, and Other Realities of Adolescence By Wiseman, Rosalind (Book - 2002) Non-F 649.125 WisOdd Girl Out The Hidden Culture of Aggression in Girls By Simmons, Rachel (Book - 2002) Non-F 302.54 SimBullies Are A Pain in the Brain By Romain, Trevor (Book - 1997) Ju 302.34 RomThese books are listed on the http://www.prsunited.com/ website • Your Child: Bully or Victim? Understanding and Ending School YardTyranny by Peter Sheras• A Parents Guide to Understanding and Responding to Bullying: TheBully Busters Approach by A Horne, J. Stoddard, C. Bell• Say Something by Peggy Moss (for elementary school-age children)• books by Trudy Lustig (for elementary school-age children)
Not In Our TownAnnual Report of 2011 ActivitiesContinuing Conversations on Race continued to meet on the first Monday of each month 7:30 PM atthe Princeton Public Library throughout the year except for the summer months. The group continues tobe a popular community forum. NIOT values this activity especially because it reaches individuals whowould be less likely to attend scheduled events - a younger, working population, usually not affiliatedwith a religious institution. There is considerable variety among the attenders from month to month,balanced by a core group of five to six regulars, as well as members of NIOT.There has been growing concern over the number of “bullying” incidents that have occurred in thePrinceton area, including several in Princeton itself. At its March meeting, NIOT members decided tomake “bullying” a major focus of NIOT activities in 2011.NIOT joined the YWCA in their April 29, 2011 Stand Against Racism event by engaging the businesscommunity in a commitment to end racism by displaying signs in their establishments saying “WeStand Against Racism Today and Every Day.” NIOT purchased an ad in Town Topics which listed allthe participating businesses and submitted a letter to the editor to run concurrently with the ad. NIOTmembers canvassed and distributed signs throughout the central business areas.In May NIOT co-sponsored the film Welcome to Shelbyville at the Princeton Public Library.NIOT's annual Unity Award Reception took place on June 5, 2011 at the Carl Field Center on thePrinceton campus. This year's event was an especially joyous and uplifting occasion. NIOT receivedmany appreciative comments recognizing its work in raising awareness about racism in the communityand honoring students who are “ role models in their efforts to promote respect for diversity and toadvance the cause of race relations.”In July (7/5/11) NIOT was a co-sponsor in a Community Roundtable on Immigration initiated by theLatin American Legal Defense and Education Fund at Princeton Public Library. A member of NIOTparticipated in the panel. There were presentations and discussion. The event was well attended, withmany members of the Latino community present.NIOT's Bullying Series was initiated in September (9/12/11) with the showing of the film, “Light inthe Darkness.” This excellent film, produced and developed by The Working Group, describes acommunity's response to anti-immigrant violence following the murder of an Ecuadorian resident. Thefilm was followed by discussion. Attenders were given index cards as they arrived and invited todescribe 'bullying' episodes from their own lives (anonymously). Twenty-seven cards were submitted atthe end of the meeting with many very moving and informative accounts of various kinds of bullying,describing who helped and who didn't, and the effects on their lives at the time and afterwards. Planningfor the “Bullying” series continued through the fall. A series of four events is under development.In December (12/05/11) NIOT supported PPL in promoting the film, Prince Among Slaves. The film,produced by Unity Productions Foundation, tells the harrowing true story of an African Muslim prince,Abdul Rahman, who was captured in a war in Africa and sold into slavery to a small plantation ownerin Mississippi . He spent 40 years in slavery without ever losing his dignity or sense of self-worth. Heeventually was able to buy his release and became an ardent and effective spokesman for emancipation.Following the film, Princeton University Professor Kwami Appiah reflected on the Abdul Rahman story.Apiah centered his remarks around the concept of dignity, pointing out that the worst crime of slavery -even worse than physical abuse - is the erosion of dignity. These thoughts were explored more fully inthe NIOT Continuing Conversation group that followed.January 2012
